Rules for non-pet owners who visit & complain about my pets

1. they lives here and you don't

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes stay off the furniture(thats why its called "fur"niture

3.I like my pets a lot, better than I like most people

4. To you its an animal. To me they are an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy and walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
Dogs and cats are better then kids.
They eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don't hang out with drug using friends, don't smoke or drink,don't wear your clothes, and don't need a gazillion dollars for college and IF they get pregnant you can sell their children..